The Unauthorized Homily

By Bill Dunn

A commentary on the Scripture readings from the Sunday Lectionary

(Scripture readings for Sunday, December 30th: Sirach 3:2-6, 12-14; Colossians 3:12-21; Matthew 2:13-15, 19-23)

HOLIDAY STRESS HURTS FAMILIES

Humorist Dave Barry observes that the holidays are a very special time “when we take a break from our hectic everyday lives to spend quality time with our loved ones, rediscovering all the reasons why we don’t actually live with them.”

As with all effective satire, there is a nugget of truth contained in this statement. But after chuckling at Barry’s remark, isn’t it sad that the holiday season has become as well known for strained family relations as it is known for tinsel and toys and decorated trees?

In the last few decades, the basic building block of society, the family, has taken a major hit. Families are fracturing and disintegrating left and right. And many of the families that haven’t disintegrated yet are under a great deal of strain and stress—strain and stress that gets exacerbated during the holiday season.

Do you want to know why people these days can instantly relate when they hear a Christmas carol parody called “It’s the Most STRESSFUL Time of the Year”? The answer is simple: we’ve taken Christ out of Christmas. We’ve forgotten Jesus, the “reason for the season.”

Now, of course I don’t mean that faithful Christians suddenly become pagans and renounce their faith during the month of December. I just mean that many people get so overwhelmed by the cultural and commercial aspects of Christmas—aspects that have nothing to do, by the way, with the Incarnation of Christ—that they’ve put Jesus way on the back burner, almost out of sight. In doing so, folks have pretty much guaranteed that they will be miserable during the holidays.

This Sunday at church, a few days after Christmas Day, is the Feast of the Holy Family. The main theme of the three Scripture readings is patience. And patience, more than anything else, is the key to having peaceful and happy families. When people practice patience toward their relatives, the all-too-common strain and stress are greatly reduced.

In the first reading, from the Book of Sirach, we read, “My son, take care of your father when he is old….Even if his mind fails, be considerate of him.” (Obviously this passage applies to daughters as well as sons, and to mothers as well as fathers.)

A little later in the reading God reminds us that He is paying attention. “Kindness to a father will not be forgotten.” God is aware of our difficult circumstances, and He will bless us when we set aside our own personal desires and instead show patience toward a loved one who needs our help.

In the second reading, from the letter to the Colossians, St. Paul pleads with all believers to be patient. He writes, “As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another.”

This is such wise and wonderful advice. When we are patient, when we are humble, when we are quick to forgive one another, that’s when we experience true peace and serenity.

Have you ever met people who are just itching to be offended? They’re like loaded guns with hair triggers just waiting to go off at the slightest provocation, whether real or imagined. It’s almost as if they enjoy being offended. It allows them to present another command performance of the self-righteous indignation drama, complete with sighing, scowling, and grumbling. It also allows them to gossip endlessly about the person who committed the terrible offense. Usually, at that point the atmosphere is pretty much poisoned for the rest of the day (or week or month or lifetime).

In the gospel reading this week, we read about that paragon of patience, St. Joseph. Let’s remember what he has already been through. First, he discovered that his fiancée was pregnant, and he wasn’t the father. But God’s messenger spoke to Joseph in a dream and told him to take her into his house as his wife anyway.

Then, after Jesus was born, when his wife Mary and the child were in no condition to travel, God’s angel again spoke to Joseph in a dream and told him to pack up and move from his homeland all the way to Egypt—immediately!

Then, as we read this week, the angel of the Lord spoke to Joseph in a dream and told him it’s time to pack up again and go back home. Not once during this whole period did Joseph say, “Hey, wait a minute! What about me? When do I get to do what I want?!”

Joseph was able to be at peace and to do what was right because he did two things—two things we ought to emulate. First, he was patient. He didn’t get frustrated with his wife, or with the baby, or with God, or with his circumstances. He trusted that God had a special plan for their lives, even if he wasn’t quite sure of the details. Joseph set aside his own plans and desires and submitted to God’s will. That allowed him to be patient.

Second, Joseph focused his attention on Jesus. Now, of course, at that point in time, Jesus was a helpless baby who needed Joseph’s protection. In our day and age, Jesus is the risen Savior who is seated at the right hand of the Father and who rules over all the world. Despite this difference, our actions should be the same as Joseph’s: focus our attention on Jesus.

If we sincerely try to do these two things during this Christmas season—be patient and focus on Jesus—then our families just might become the exception rather than the rule. Maybe we will avoid the family-related strain and stress so common this time of year. Then we can truly sing “It’s the Most WONDERFUL Time of the Year!”

©2007